Thursday 24 May 2018

Descriptive Piece of Writing.

This week for writing we go to watch a video and pick a seen that we liked and had to write about the seen in a descriptive way. I found it a bit difficult because I would kept writing the whole video and would forget that I was suppose to only write about my seen  . 

Wing

Sprinting through the cold misty forest full of terror I slam the wooden door behind me afraid that the devil crows would come back. Looking out the window the haunting tower like trees making everything more scary as the black evil crows swarming the skies above.





  

2 comments:

  1. Kia Ora Katelin!

    This is great descriptive writing! I really like that you have explained what we had to do and then shared your writing aswell as a picture of wing!

    I also like that you have highlighted the words that are new to your descriptive writing! What is your favourite part about descriptive writing?

    Maybe next time you could write a little more because when I finished reading your writing I wanted a little more to see what else happend!

    He whetu koe! (Your a star!)
    Katelynn F (Totara 2, Grey Main School)

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  2. Hi Katelin. Your first sentence creates an immediate sense of dread and fear, causing me to imagine myself running through this "forest full of terror", making my skin tingle with goosebumps. Great work! Tumeke te mahi!

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Thank-you for your positive, thoughtful, helpful comment.